Eye Contact

Yesterday I’ve read an article about eye movements. It analyzes the functions of the eye movements and how they influence communication. “The eyes are regarded as the most important nonverbal message system,” said the essay. Basically, the messages communicated by the eyes depending on three main elements: duration, direction, and quality. The average length of gaze is 2.95 seconds; that of mutual gaze is 1.18 seconds. Direction is then very depending; it counts on who you are and what you are doing. If you are now talking to your friend, your most acceptable direction is your friends’ eyes. However if you are now delivering a speech, you should scan the entire audience. Last, the quality is how wide or how narrow your eyes get during interaction.

In my opinion, the most interesting part is that merely with an eye contact, you can have the magical power to change the physical distance between yourself and another person. After last summer’s Chinese Program I joined, I have learnt to look into not only foreigners’ eyes directly but also the people around me. I’ve noticed that it’s quite common for westerners to look straight into other people’s eyes while they are having a communication. Contrarily, we Taiwanese are not very used to this style, especially when we are talking to a foreigner. Maybe it’s because we lack of confidence when speaking English, or maybe it’s just our habit. Most of Chinese don’t look into the other’s eyes directly while speaking; we look away regularly. But why? Is that our education taught us that looking into others’ eyes is rude?

Actually, I’m quite happy that I’ve change my old habit and become more comfortable and confident to look straight into others’ eyes while I’m talking to them. After my changing, I’ve found that my eye contact has helped my communication with others. They seem to have more reaction and show more interests in talking to me. Even my friends would tell me that I look different because of my eye expression has changed, which is more confident and brighter. I think this is what I gain from the experience of making friends with foreigners. I appreciate that sincerely. It helps me both substantially.